Jordan Balesterri is a character created by Westside JDM
- "I wish dad my dad would stop making me study, he's the reason I have no life."
- "If coach yells at me again, I'm gonna talk back. I'm done with her."
- "Maybe I should get Matt to order a pizza to my house, Dad's reactions are pretty priceless."
- "I should ditch gymnastics today."
Watching a fight
- "Rip that loser apart you neanderthal!"
- "Make him cry!"
- "Beat that wimp up you savage!"
- "Did I just see blood?!?!"
- "I don't think I can go on anymore..."
- "*sobs* Why does this always have happen to me?..."
- "You're gonna be sorry... really sorry..."
- "At least it wasn't dad who did this..."
- "*sobs* How am I going to get through the rest of the day like this?..."
- "Why did you need to do this to me?...."
- "Just when I thought today couldn't get any better... this happens..."
- "What did I do to deserve this?..."
Hit by bike
- "God damnit learn how to use that!"
- "Looks like somebody needs training wheels again"
- "What was that?"
Hit by a car
- "What the hell was that? a train?!?!"
- "Somebody! call 911!"
- "If I broke my leg, I'm gonna sue you."
- "Who taught you how to drive?!?"
- "My dad's a cop!"
Has a rat thrown at
- "You have problems, you know that?"
- "You need help, more help than I do."
- "It's not like I've lived with a corrupt dad for 17 years."
- "Whenever there's something good in my life, it always get ruined"
- "I should just give up."
On good terms
- "How are you?"
- "What's up?"
On bad terms
- "What would give you a reason to even talk to me?"
- "Stop bugging me."
- "Go away"
- "I don't have time for you."
On good terms
- "I haven't made out in a while, it's time I've made out"
- "Sei Cosi Sexy"
- Smiles* "Let's make out"
On bad terms
- "Go flirt with Eunice, She'll make out with anyone."
- "You'd think I'd even waste my time with you? You're pathetic."
- "Don't even think about it."
- "Do I look like Lola? I'm not a slut like she is."
Flirted with by Ginji
- "Let's kiss, I want to show you how much I love you."
- "I love you with all my heart."
- "You're really all I have left.".
Flirted with by Jimmy
- "Not today, Jimmy"
- "You're more psychotic than me."
- "I know that you date at least three other girls, I wasn't born yesterday."
Rejecting a Nerd
- "You stalk me all day, and now you expect me to kiss you? Fuck off!"
- "Get away from me, you stalker!"
- "I'm way out of your league, go flirt with Eunice, she's in your league."
Rejecting a Greaser
- "I already have a boyfriend"
- "I don't want to get grease all over my clothes."
- "I just know you'll pay more attention to your bike, and not me."
Rejecting a Prep
- "You're not my type."
- "Go bug Pinky, she's single."
- "The color of your clothes hurt my eyes."
Rejecting a Jock
- "You're not even that cute."
- "Don't you have a game to attend?"
Rejecting a townie
- "Get a job."
- "Take a shower."
- "Put some nicer clothes on."
- "What are you waiting for?"
- "Do you want to kiss me or not?"
- "Why are you stalling?"
- "You're a great kisser."
- "Am I a good kisser?"
- "I hope nobody saw."
Reacting to vandalism
Watching something get broken
- "Let me smash that!"
- "That is very illegal."
Watching somebody tag something
- "Fuck this town! Give me that."
- "This isn't Eastside Bullworth."